The Unexamined Life is not Worth Living

In thrall to his accusers and the court, Socrates chose a noble death, no begging, no justification, no exile. When facing that terrible fate, he said the famous quote, “the unexamined life is not worth living”. The body can be killed, but virtue is eternal. Socrates got killed, yet his works and deeds survived. He became immortal by seeking goodness, surrendering to wisdom, discipline, valour, ethics, morals and a strong character until his last breath.

“I say that it is the greatest good for a man to discuss virtue every day and those other things about which you hear me conversing and testing myself and others, for the unexamined life is not worth living” (Apology 38a).
Apology 38a, Plato

What would I do in his place? Would I have taken the shortcut? Would I have been afraid of death?

In thinking about the episode above, I can’t help but wonder about our actions and attitude at every given time. What are we doing now, in the present, the only time we have to live? Are we spending enough time soul-searching and examining our thoughts, emotions, feeling and attitudes? Nobody knows when we will depart from this form of existence; life is undoubtedly fleeting, hence the need to self-examine. That is what the stoics called “Memento Mori”.

“Let us prepare our minds as if we’d come to the very end of life. Let us postpone nothing. Let us balance life’s books each day. … The one who puts the finishing touches on their life each day is never short of time.”
Seneca

The ancient wisdom from Jewish literature also expresses a similar notion. In the book of Koheleth (aka Ecclesiastes), the Sage (believed to be King Shlomo) denotes the benefit of observing the end of things rather than going along with partying and debauchery. We live in a world that encourages and rewards profligacy, sensuality, or the life of the senses rather than reason. Our brains are chemically hardwired to avoid stoic discipline and embrace epicurean pleasures, though even the latter is misinterpreted. The Sage suggests that a wise person should be drawn to a house of mourning, yet simpletons, fools, those only interested in the service of their senses, to a house of merrymaking. In that sense, he advocates that vexation is better than revelry, as in internal conflict, one can reach true bliss through self-examination.

Upon meditating on the words of ancient philosophers and sages, I urge myself to embrace the discipline of self-examination as the pathway to a life worth living, to remember that we are only here for a very brief moment, to make every second count as the present time lost will never return. Though it often comes back in the shape of the ghost of the past, regrets creep in, besmirching our souls.

We take nothing from this world; that is the truth, but while we are in it, we have, like Socrates, a choice of how we want to live it and how we want to depart from it, whether with high moral and ethical standards, being the best we can to us and others, or by just living an inconsequential and unintentional existence.

How will you be remembered? The image next is a sculpture in a place not far from where I stay when I am in Austria. It is the “Die Pieta” or Cloack of Conscience. It is meant to symbolise what we leave behind when we die or what outlives us.

It says, “The love we gave, our deeds and works, the misery we went through.”

We are very preoccupied with reaching success, to achieve greatness so much that we forget the little things in life, the importance of virtue and the commitment to becoming a better person every day.

One of my favourite quotes for success is from Ralph Waldo Emerson, who understands success, happiness and life pursuits from a different perspective from most social media posts.

“What is success?
To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate the beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch Or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded!”
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Note to self: self-examine daily, seek virtue and justice, be kind, love much, and learn to find contentment with every little thing.

New Year…(not so) new me…

But that is not all bad!

Between Jan 15th and 19th, most of us will have given up on our resolutions. The third Thursday is considered by many the D-day, where the new year’s resolution will utterly sink. Every year millions of us gather all the energy we can possibly master to make sure we will stick to our new year’s resolution, and yet around mid-Jan, we have already got beaten by old habits, and they tend to die hard.

Let’s face it: if the goals set are not grounded in self-discipline and a robust process, it is unlikely to be successful. However, there is more to success than achieving a new year’s goal. For instance, being congruent and truthful with who we are is also paramount. The truth will set you free – you must be intentional and focused and trust the process.

Bringing part of our old self into the new year is not bad. There are many good things inside of you that you should keep and make sure to develop in the new year. Instead of focusing only on the new stuff you want to create, why not look inside yourself and build up greatness from the things you know you can develop and be great at! What can you be grateful for? Celebrate that too, and experience joy in life.

After that, think about why you are setting these goals? Motivations and needs. Maybe you say – I need to lose weight, for example. Ok, why? Perhaps instead of focusing on weight loss, you aim to change eating habits and get more physically fit as your starting point. Take that pressure away immediately, and focus on the positive aspect of gaining something rather than losing.

But, then, how? Get a journal and write down all you need to do and what you need to learn. Make an inventory of what you are currently eating. What can you change? How fit are you? Map the step-by-step process, and set milestones. Join a club, enter a race, etc. The resolution will not work itself out. Work out your resolution and change it into a lifestyle, get yourself a Mantra, and become what you want to achieve before you see it through. Now replace weights with anything else, and the process is the same.

I use Strava to track my sports results and connect with others in my fitness network. They looked at more than 108 million entries in the U.S. and realised that most Americans are likelier to quit their resolutions on a Thursday. By Jan 19th, most of us would have gone back to old ways, not because of the decision we made but how we want to tackle the year added to how we see ourselves and the nature of the goal we are setting. We want to use the new year as motivation, but in all honesty, we need discipline and specific steps to measure our progress with whatever we want to achieve.

“Let all your efforts be directed to something, let it keep that end in view. It’s not activity that disturbs people, but false conceptions of things that drive them mad.”
― Seneca

Your life is way more significant than the year you are currently living in, and you want to set goals that might take you further than the year you are entering. I started the new year in December 2022, working on many of my processes and what I wanted to add, change, develop, increase, etc.; I also reviewed other goals not linked to the new year and reviewed them all.

What do I need to do, and how are they connected to who I am and where I am going?

Do you know where you are going? Are you running a marathon or a sprint? Think about the next two, three and five years. What changes can you make today that will impact your future self? But you have got to know where you are heading. Lewis Carrol in Alice in Wonderland wrote something like, “If you don’t know where you are going, any road will get you there”.

Do you know who you are?”A person who doesn’t know their purpose in life doesn’t know who they are or what the universe is.”
― Marcus Aurelius

The “Who” element – your identity defines your purpose, and vice-versa; a life purpose will shape your identity, and both together will support your vision, goals and objectives for any stage of your life. Do you know who you are? Bringing your good old self into the new year, your great qualities, your experience and what you are good at and building it up is part of the process, don’t leave anything good behind; get better instead. You need to flourish in the new year and get brighter and brighter because you can also help others to become better versions of themselves.

To Summarise:

Decide where you are going.
What do you need to bring with you to that journey, and what you want to leave behind
The journey is not only for the year; think beyond that.
You have greatness within you; how will you manifest that this year?
What do you want to change this year and why?
Be intentional about it, write a process, measurements and milestones, and join others along the way.
Be truthful to who you are and trust the process.

What is your response when you get stuck?

Have you got stuck in a situation where you feel you have lost all control over it? Or, you just don’t know what to do with a relationship? That feeling overwhelms you, it brings anxiety, and headaches and suddenly your mind, body and soul are affected, not only that, it starts affecting loved ones too. I guess we all have been there, but What if you can move just an inch?

Last year I was in a very dire situation, feeling completely powerless. I needed all my energy and mind power to be able to come out of that place stronger. The issue was taking over my thoughts day and night. When that happens you have to be incredibly stoic about it. I had to go back to my notes, my books, meditation, talk to some senior mentors, etc. And finally, I managed to create a different reality for the whole situation first in my mind and then allow that to be manifested in the context of the problem/challenge. It worked but it did not go all at once, it took some pushes and shoves internally, moving my mindset inch by inch to the correct mind frame.

When a difficult situation appears, a storm brews on the horizon, and your boat is rattled by ranging waves, be assured and know that you have inside you the power to ride out the storm. When you don’t know what to do and how to deal with a particular tough circumstance: stop! The best thing to do is to stop and ask yourself a question:

What is the smallest change I can make right now to move just one inch and give me an edge? Instead of focusing on the overall big picture aim your focus on the minimal change you can make. Perhaps that will be just a change in your perspective, a happy thought, or a deep breath, a walk in the park, a chat with a friend, etc.

If you can move one inch in the right direction, you are already set to keep going and get momentum.

The Stoic Emperor Marcus Aurelius talks about three areas we need to go about our business and weather any storm that comes our way in our daily lives.

“All you need are these: certainty of judgment in the present moment; action for the common good in the present moment; and an attitude of gratitude in the present moment for anything that comes your way”
Marcus Aurelius

Book writer and philosopher Ryan Holiday calls these “the three overlapping but critical disciplines of Stoicism”. They sum up the essence of Stoic Philosophy. Once you take control over your own judgments, you direct your actions accordingly and you are willing to accept the obstacles that come your way, then you will start moving inch by inch towards the desired outcome in any challenging situation you are going through.

When you get stuck:

1 – don’t look out, look inside of you, search your feelings and emotions.

2 – Secondly, take a break, and breathe.

3 – Think like a stoic and follow the three steps above

4 – Share your load with trusted mentors and people around you.

5- Never forget that storms don’t last forever

How is your personal level of energy?

Yes, that is 2023, already and before you notice it will be 2024. So, what are you going to do about it?

Some of us are already super pumped for the year, and some others are feeling exhausted and still carrying much of the burden from the past year. But despite which category you are in, the key is to focus on what you can change, we lose a lot of our energy and peace thinking and worrying about things that are outside our immediate control.

You are Amazing, and you are unique, now tell yourself the things that are part of your day within your control and those that are not, forget the latter. That immediately boosts your energy levels, trust me, since I started to practice that my life has changed drastically.

“The chief task in life is simply this: to identify and separate matters so that I can say clearly to myself which are externals not under my control, and which have to do with the choices I actually control. Where then do I look for good and evil? Not to uncontrollable externals, but within myself to the choices that are my own…”

― Epictetus

Motivation gets you going, self-discipline takes you all the way

“All life forms drive to the maximum of its potential except human beings”
Jim Rohn

Your motivation is a good starting point but after while you will not be able to rely on it. It might fail you. You get distracted, you get sidetracked and betrayed by your own feeling.

What drives you must turn into an automatic self-discipline system. Only motivation cannot take you all the way to the finish line. There will be days that you do not feel like doing it. In those days, only habits and self-discipline can get you to pass your feeling.

Today is Sunday, I’m on holiday, or at least I’m supposed to be, but I made a commitment to myself. I have gotten up 5:30am, I did not feel like, my mind was saying ‘f#$k that s@#t I’m going back to bed’, my commitment and self-discipline drove me here not my motivation.

We are constantly bombarded by hundreds if not thousands of different stimulus. Most of us live with the pressures of our social lives, people around us, family and friends and loved ones. Powerful branded messages from products, entertainment, useless shopping gadgets, etc. All that sensory messages play a powerful role in our feelings and emotions, ultimately in our decision making. We can get easily demotivated and sidetracked. We get pushed away from our vision and goals. Our motivation betrays us.

“Let all communication devices serve you but let no one interfere with you”
Jim Rohn

We think we can postpone, do it later, after all, just a bit of distraction will not make any difference. A bit of this, a bit of that, and suddenly the week has gone, the months and the years. I can attest to that in many areas of my life.

In reality tomorrow doesn’t exist. it is invisibly shrouded and seeded in the actions we take today. Take a close look at this, do you remember how many tomorrows have since passed and have become nothing more than of a shadowed yesterday’s memory. Today when you ponder upon, you wished you had taken a different set of action and achieved a different outcome.

Self-discipline will make you work harder on your self than on your own job. Good habits will spring you into success and fortune. That’s why most people do not achieve anything, it is easy to get sidetracked and stopped.

As Jim puts it, you must develop “The ant philosophy”. They never quit, the think winter all summer and they seem to be in a hurry. All stoics philosophers told us to plan all the negative scenarios when all is positive. The ant thinks summer is winter. They are not motivated, they are discipline to achieve their goals.

Les Brown says “do what is easy and your life will be hard, do what is hard and your life will be easy”. Self-discipline is the key to take you all the way to the finish line.

5 Steps to Becoming a Change Agent Marketer

*adapted from Seth Godin’s This is Marketing

“Marketing is the generous act of helping others to become who they seek to become. It involves creating honest stories—stories that resonate and spread.”

Seth Godin, This Is Marketing: You Can’t Be Seen Until You Learn to See